Growing Pains (Lorelei) - Under the Big Top

She grinned.

"Your turn. Take a guess."

He frowned looking at her.

"You don't.. smell.. that different. So, I dont know."

She smiled.

"Ah. Well, since I probably shouldn't talk about it, if you don't have an issue with it, it's all good."

He shrugged.

'You want to tell me though, dont you? Are you like her.. step parents?"

she didnt feel turdy.. err smell wyrmy.

She shook her head.

"No, I'm not like them."

He smiled.

"Okay. well I guess I will just not know unless you or her ever tell me. I only really care about the happiness and health of those two over there."

She tilted her head.

"Then why did you blow her off when you found out she was knocked up?"

He lifted an eyebrow.

"Is that what she thinks happened?"

He looked at the other room, where mother and daughter lay.

"The situation is pretty complicated. I met Lorelei while I was in a rather dark place. I think she was too. There was a situation where the woman I have loved for some time and I could not be together. So.. I went to forget. Dancing. Lorelei and I met, we had one night of fun. WE both got caught up and didnt talk precautions.

By the time she came to me, everything had changed. I was with Hedwig. I didn't blow her off. I just.. knew that I didn't love Lorelei. I want to help support her and our baby.. but after that she became very.. adamant."

She stared at him.

"So, she's good enough to fuck but not good enough to actually stand by her? Wow, no wonder she doesn't want to talk to me about you."

He blinked.

"Really? That is what you got from that?No, she was a nice person and hot. We both agreed to go our own ways. Three days later the love of my life comes to me and says we can be together, that everything has changed. When she came back to tell me she was pregnant, she was the one who decided, she didnt want to be saddled with a man who loved another woman. We agreed that I would help her as much as she let me. In case you havent noticed she is a bit independant."

She nodded.

"I noticed. I also noticed how you didn't fight much."

He looked at her. There was something very serious in his voice.

"And do what, trap her in a relationship where she doesnt love me and I dont love her? What would come of that? As it is, she found someone she loves and I will support this child as much as she lets me. I will be here for it."

She shook her head.

"You don't get it. It's not about trapping her in a relationship that she doesn't want to be in. It's not even about what she wants or doesn't want. What it's about is showing her that she's not just a notch on your bedpost. But, it's all good, that's all she was to you anyway. A good lay until you could fuck who you really wanted to."

He looked at her.

"What she was, what we both were, was a chance encounter, someone we encountered by accident. A random encounter. I wasn't planning on having sex. I dont think she was either. It happened. I can't tell you what would have happened if things went differently. Would I have gone to see her again if things were differnt? Would i have gotten to know her? Probably. This was an accident. Not a hating women or not taking care of esponsibility thing. A beautful accident. An amazing accident. I am no more a bastard for not getting together with her than she was for not getting together with me."

She stared at him.

"You weren't here for that pregnancy. You didn't hold her hand or let her cry against you when she was sad and worried. Don't try to make yourself into a great guy. You're not a great guy. You're a coward. And the only reason that I'm even allowing you to be in this apartment right now is because she wanted you here for the birth of your daughter. If you ask me, you don't deserve to call yourself a father."

He sighed.

"Think of me as you wish."

She smiled.

"I do."

He nodded and continued to clean.

Obviously, the two of them were not going to get along so he just continued to work.

After she sat down with her mug of tea, Loki the large tiger, came plodding out of the bedroom. He wound himself around and through her feet, enough to lay his massive head in her lap.

Buck finished the cleaning an washed his hands, looking around.

She didn't seem to mind if Buck was there. She just didn't have anything to say to him at the moment.

That was fine. He watched the baby for a little while longer and then went outside, to just think, waiting for the mom to wake up. he wanted to see the baby one more time. If she continued to sleep for hours he would leave, leaving a note tell her he would be back the next day and she could reach him if she wanted anything when he came by.

And not once did she make a move to stop him. She just drank her tea with the giant cat in her lap.

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