Visitors! (Teddy and Cassiel) - Lad Nah's Clockwork Death House

The chuckle was choked, pained. It was a strange sound because it ought to be a happy one and it just sounded confused.
"The last time I felt true fear..." she had to think back as her voice grew quiet again. "Was when I woke up in the snow and found my heart no longer beat..."

The blonde fell silent. At least she'd stopped crying as her eyes lowered with a distant gaze, perhaps in thought. Her shoulders slumping as the painful tension finally loosened it's grip.
So much to think about...

"If that was the last time... Why so much fake fear in the last several months?" Cass squatted down and looked at her. Because in truth, she knew Teddy, and she knew the fear wasn't fake...

"Its not fake... It started and I couldn't... I couldn't make it let go away" blue blood shot eyes turned to the Rose. "It didn't go away..." she whispered.

"And what made you hold on to it so?"

"I don't know..." she said weakly. "It was just there... and every time I thought I'd managed to beat it down... it came back"

"The only way to beat it back is to face it. Beat it down. And you may have to do that over and over and over again. It may never end. But... you have to..."

"Trying..." she smiled weakly, though she did smile. "Trying... I want to be whole..."

"Only you can allow yourself to be whole, Teddy. I know you want it. So take it."

She fell silent because there wasn't really anything she could say to that.
Still trying... still trying... She gave a barely noticeable nod.

She reached over and kissed the top of her head. There wasn't anything else Cass could do. She wanted to fix everything. But... it wasn't something she could honestly do.

So, they would wait. Both because the Caitiff knew her knees would fail her if she tried to stand up too soon and because she couldn't leave before she knew Lad'Nah was okay.
She leaned lightly against Cassiel, wiping her face clean with the sleeve of her hoodie, though careful not to mess up the Rose's clothes.

Wasn't much she could do to ruin Cass' old clothes. Black was black, it was all good.

After about an hour and a little bit, Lad Nah returned, looking tired but no worse for the wear.

"I'm sorry for keeping you waiting." She said as she took her seat on her foot rest again.

The bowl had been covered witha white cloth.

"You alright?" Teddy asked softly, having at least cleaned herself up so she no longer looked like something out of a horror movie. "It looked painful..." had sounded painful too.

"Yes, I'm fine, thank you. Did you get your answers?" She asked hopefully.

"Sort of... They weren't necessarily pleasant..." though they needn't be, they only needed to be truthful. Which meant the Caitiff took a deep breath and recited both what she'd asked and the answers, word by word as her mind had the ability to store such memories with eerie perfection.

"Alright, so these people don't like you... Well that is something. So what do you think of all that?" She asked, tilting her head.

"I wouldn't have been surprised had it been one. To be hated by several..." she looked down at her hands. "That hurts... And to be told I'm hurting the one closest to me... that's" unbearable really, though she was making an effort not to break down again.
"Someone feels justified in hurting me, the spell was cast with ill intent because someone believes I'm hurting the one closest to me and the one furthest from me..." a sideways glance was thrown in Cassiel's direction. "Perhaps the best I can do..." she sighed and bit her lip, looking to Lad'Nah. "Is to simply leave it be... and try to and hope and beg if needed... that Medwyn will forgive me. That the ones hating me will let the hate go if they see I'm not hurting anyone anymore. Even if I've never consciously meant to hurt anyone... least of all my lover"

"You don't beg... Begging makes it worse," Cass interjected softly. "You've nothing to beg for."

"Well, just because they think you're hurting him doesn't mean youa re, but then again, maybe it does." She shrugged.

"I don't know the situation well enough or who this lover of yours is. But I agree with Cassiel. No use in begging. Be who you are and some will hate you and some will love you and that is life."

"You might've seen him... he's the Prince's Childe, Medwyn Bauer" the blonde said softly, her fingers playing with the ring on her hand, a smile, a genuine one at last, creeping across her lips even if it was a bit pale compared to normal.
"My heart and soul..." she looked at Lad'Nah. "The missing half of myself.." and no, she didn't car eone bit how cheesy that sounded. It was true.

"The prince's childe... so who do you know cares about Medwyn other than you and... the Prince?" Lad Nah asked, logically.

"Figure out from your clues your potential enemies." She encouraged. "But I'm afraid I'm not help in this, as I do not know many in this domain yet."

"His family, his friends... but I can't understand having made enemies of them.." at least she hope she hadn't. "The Harpy has taken an interesting in helping him" she said a bit more quietly. But she was Toreador, and Lad'Nah said she didn't have the generation to break Teddy's mental defences. Who knew though... stranger things had happened there.

The blonde drew her breath and straightened up a little.
"I don't care about who think themselves my enemies... as long as they don't hurt those I care about and love. Then they can hate me all they want" and Hell, she'd take whatever else pain they decided to throw her way just because they could. As long as they didn't hurt those she cared about.

"Well it's a lot to think about." She sighed and stood. "I guess this is no time to be visiting. You are welcome to stay here for as long as you like. I even have beds if you need them."

"Lad'Nah..." she reached out to take her hand if she'd let her. "Thank you... it must've been hurt, what you went through to let me ask the questions I did... thank you..." she didn't want the Malkavian thinking her ungrateful.